Noticing something different about how your toddler connects with the world is one of the more unsettling experiences a parent can have. If you've been wondering whether some of what you're seeing might be related to autism, this guide is for you. It's written to help you understand what to look for — without alarm, and without false reassurance.
Autism is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects how people communicate, process the world around them, and relate to others. It's a spectrum, which means it looks very different from one person to the next. Some autistic people need significant daily support; many lead fully independent lives. Early identification matters because early support makes a genuine difference.
The signs that show up earliest
Autism can sometimes be identified in children as young as 12–18 months, though many children aren't diagnosed until later. The earliest signs often involve social communication — the back-and-forth interaction that typically develops before spoken language.
Things to notice in the first two years:
- Eye contact: Not avoiding all eye contact, but a noticeable difference in how often or naturally your child uses it to connect with you
- Pointing: Most children point to share interest in things by around 12 months ("look, a bird!") — not just to ask for things, but to invite you into what they're noticing
- Responding to their name: Children typically respond reliably to their name by 12 months
- Shared enjoyment: Does your child look back at you when something exciting happens, as if to share the moment?
- Imitation: Copying simple actions and gestures is an early social skill that often develops in the first year
It's important to note that none of these signs alone means a child is autistic. Many children have one or two of these differences for other reasons. What autism specialists look for is a pattern across multiple areas.
Social and communication differences in toddlers
As children move into the toddler years, some additional patterns may become more visible:
- Preferring to play alongside rather than with other children, with limited interest in what other children are doing
- Difficulty with the give-and-take of conversation — waiting for a turn, responding to what the other person said
- Using language in unusual ways — repeating phrases from TV or books (echolalia), or talking a lot about one specific topic
- Rarely using gestures like waving, nodding, or shaking their head
- Seeming to relate better to adults than to peers of the same age
- Distress when social situations are unpredictable or hard to read
Some autistic children are very talkative but have difficulty with the social aspects of communication. Others say very little. Both can be autism.
Repetitive behaviours and sensory differences
Alongside social communication, autism often involves repetitive behaviours and differences in how sensory information is processed. These might include:
- Lining up toys or objects, or becoming very upset if arrangements are changed
- Strong attachment to routines and distress when they change unexpectedly
- Intense, narrow interests — knowing everything about one topic to a level that's unusual for their age
- Repetitive physical movements: hand-flapping, rocking, spinning, toe-walking
- Unusual responses to sensory input — being very bothered by certain sounds, textures, or lights, or on the other end, seeming to seek intense sensory input
Sensory differences are extremely common in autistic children and are now formally recognised as part of the diagnostic criteria. If your child seems to experience the sensory world very differently — overwhelmed by things others don't notice, or craving sensory input that seems unusual — it's worth mentioning during any assessment.
What to do if you're concerned
Talk to your GP. In Australia, a GP can refer your child for a developmental paediatric assessment or an autism assessment. The assessment process usually involves a paediatrician or a specialist team that includes a psychologist and a speech pathologist.
You can also speak with your child health nurse or, in many states, your Maternal and Child Health nurse. They carry out developmental screening at key ages and can refer on if needed.
An autism assessment in Australia can be funded through Medicare with appropriate referrals. If your child receives a diagnosis, they will likely be eligible for NDIS support, which can fund psychology, speech pathology, occupational therapy, and other supports that make a real difference.
Don't wait until your child is school-age if you're noticing things now. Early support — particularly in the toddler and preschool years — has very strong evidence behind it.
Frequently asked questions
My child makes eye contact sometimes. Does that rule out autism?
No. Many autistic children make eye contact, particularly with familiar people or in low-demand situations. Eye contact differences in autism tend to be more subtle — it's about whether it's used naturally to connect and communicate, not whether it happens at all.
My son is 2 and very active and wilful. How do I know it's not just "boy behaviour"?
The signs of autism are present across genders, though they can look different. Girls are often diagnosed later because their presentations can be more subtle. If you're noticing a consistent pattern across multiple areas — not just one or two things — it's worth following up regardless of gender.
What does an autism assessment in Australia actually involve?
Assessments vary, but typically include observation of your child in structured and unstructured settings, standardised assessment tools, detailed parent interviews, and often reports from other professionals involved in your child's care (such as a speech pathologist or educator). The process can take several sessions.
Next steps
If you're concerned, the most useful thing you can do right now is make an appointment with your GP and describe what you're noticing. Write it down beforehand so you don't forget in the moment. You can also explore autism assessment services and psychology supports on EarlyBloom to understand your options.
Whatever the outcome of an assessment, knowing is better than wondering. Families consistently report that a clear picture — whatever it shows — makes it easier to get the right support in place.
This article is general information, not medical advice. If you're concerned about your child's development, talk to your GP or child health nurse.